Sunday, June 7, 2009

A Maxim By The Husband




We had raccoon visitors at the Seattle house & we have raccoon visitors at the Portland house. They look to be the same critters, making me wonder if they got into & traveled in the U-Haul between the two cities eight years ago. They are sorta "Disney"cute with their little bandit masked faces... but not so cute when they rip out your plants, destroy your water features, eat your fish, or ruin your alfresco dinner party (this really happened). We have a "nursery of raccoons" (really, I looked it up) situated in a big old, ivy covered cherry tree in the lot behind ours. They have become very brazen this spring. We have had some tough nights ,with little sleep, because the terriers are going berserk when they see, hear or sense the raccoons in our garden. The sound of the raccoons on our roof is anything but dainty. They sound like dancing circuit party boys on especially good drugs.

Earlier in the week, the husband & our friend T were in the back garden when some raccoons fell out of the trees...it was raining 'coons! They seem to be a whole new generation of raccoons that are not afraid of daylight, humans or canines. Yesterday I saw several raccoons enjoying happy hour at The Mouse Trap Tavern & later I spied a pair attempting to knock over a Starbucks.

I was working in the garden yesterday, when I heard the most disturbing & unusual noise, something akin to monkeys screaming coming from a back corner of the garden. The terriers & I went to investigate & we witnessed two raccoons having at it on the roof of my neighbor's shed. When I recounted the incident to the Husband, I said-" It was so odd, I couldn't tell if they were fighting or fucking". The Husband looked me in the eye & stated-
"Oh... It is a very thin line between fucking & fighting. You, of all people, should know this as a truth."

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